It’s been a long, semi-deliberate pause in the darklord’s blog. Yes it has.
There is much afoot. The changes that are being wrought across the landscape of my goddamn mind are… effluvious (if I may use a completely inappropriate and partially made-up word).
In fact, it seems almost silly to attempt to make a record of them, so fleeting are they in substance. I change completely one day, and then the next day it’s as if I was always this way, and now I’m changing again. It’s a tumoult, is what it is, like an avalanche of changes in the way I think, feel, and look out upon the world, as if somewhere along the line (maybe, I dunno, when I stopped eating all the fucking time) I pulled loose that one big rock, and it tumbled down onto that other rock, and there was this cracking noise, and suddenly the whole cliff face is in vertical descent.
…I may sound like I’m exerting hyerpbole into the paragraph you just read (assuming that you didn’t just skip to this paragraph). In a way, that is true, and given my well-established propensity for exaggeration, not surprising, but at the same time, I don’t know that I am actually overstating the effects.
Let me give you an example. This morning I had a conversation with my darling wife regarding our current financial system, and it’s robustness and shortcomings. Now, in the past, merely mentioning this general category of topics would a) make my hair stand up on end, b) make my eyes go all wide and spooky, and c) cause molten lava to actually pour from my mouth.
Ask my wife, she’ll confirm all of this.
This morning, however, in contrast to the above, I took in fact and fiction, offered opinions and explored the data, and…
…well, I had a conversation about it, didn’t I? Yessir, I think I did. A conversation that was utterly impossible not four months ago. I’m talking Rain Man impossible here, like bashing my head against the wall to make it stop make it stop make it stop kind of thing. This, not surprisingly, causes my wife a certain amount of discomfort and concern. She has come to the not unreasonable conclusion that there are some topics best left, shall we say, off the table. Thus, I believe it was something of a surprise to her to be having something that amounted to an exchange of data with me on this previously debilitating topic.
I offer this by way of example. This is one of dozens of areas of my life that have smoothed rightthefuckout, seemingly through the effort of some freakin’ change-causing-system, one that is not being dictated to by me. All I’m doing is showing up to meetings and calling people who share my affliction, and some… thing seems to have been engaged.
You want a rather astounding, real time example of how this is affecting me?
Here we go.
When I started writing this post, I wrote the title above because I haven’t told you about my World of Warcraft exploits in some time, and much has happened.
And yet, here I am, at the bottom of the page, and no WoW content.
You see? This improves your life as well.